do i look like a fucking umber

i am a 21 year old english major who wants to write dumb scifi novels

this is a song of ice and fire blog. it is not spoiler free. it.

tyrion stan for life

I don't think anyone simultaneously loves and hates their self as much as I do.

i love ireland and i cant wait till i never have to leave from there

the troy to my abed



what if there were professional text post critics


Witty and insightful. A must-reblog post. Suspense from lack of punctuation and resolution leaves the reader pondering possibilities late into the night.

The marauders


  • Who’s the messiest one: The only tidy one is Remus. James made an effort when he heard girls, and by extension Lily, did not appreciate messes and Peter followed his example, but that entire affair only lasted a week. Sirius is beyond help.
  • Who feels the most uncomfortable about PDA: Remus is afraid of being loved and that includes public displays of love
  • Who’s the funniest drunk: Peter is actually the funniest drunk, cause he will do anything on a dare
  • Who texts the most: In a modern setting I imagine Sirius and James would text so much their fingers would bleed, Peter tries to keep up with them and Remus rolls his eyes and points out that they’re all in the same room
  • Who has the most embarrassing taste in music: It’s not so much that it’s embarrassing, but Peter has a love for popular music that hipster dorks James and Sirius tease him mercilessly about
  • Who reads the most: Remus. Some teachers were sure he was the only one of the three who actually knew how
  • Who’s better with kids: James is surprisingly good with kids, Sirius and Peter would be the adults that try to win over kids with presents and coolness (with differing levels of success), but overall Remus is the most patient, understanding but firm with children after having to deal with a bunch of reckless idiots his entire life
  • Who’s the one that fixes things around the house: Purebloods wouldn’t have any idea how to fix shit without magic so Remus… If magic applies, still Remus, cause letting the others fix things usually results in panic and chaos, as non-winged items suddenly sprout wings and start to pretend they’re owls, and other such “accidents”
  • Who’s got the weirdest hobby: Sirius has a pretty impressive collection of concert ticket stubs nobody’s sure he’s even been to
  • Who cooks and who cleans up: Nobody’s that great a cook, but everyone offers to help clean up when Remus cooks

I assume this is for the relationships meme thing i did (of which i still have a ton to go back to and do, because i stopped and they’ve piled up, please don’t send more) so here you go

1. push yourself to get up before the rest of the world - start with 7am, then 6am, then 5:30am. go to the nearest hill with a big coat and a scarf and watch the sun rise.

2. push yourself to fall asleep earlier - start with 11pm, then 10pm, then 9pm. wake up in the morning feeling re-energized and comfortable.

3. get into the habit of cooking yourself a beautiful breakfast. fry tomatoes and mushrooms in real butter and garlic, fry an egg, slice up a fresh avocado and squirt way too much lemon on it. sit and eat it and do nothing else.

4. stretch. start by reaching for the sky as hard as you can, then trying to touch your toes. roll your head. stretch your fingers. stretch everything.

5. buy a 1L water bottle. start with pushing yourself to drink the whole thing in a day, then try drinking it twice.

6. buy a beautiful diary and a beautiful black pen. write down everything you do, including dinner dates, appointments, assignments, coffees, what you need to do that day. no detail is too small.

7. strip your bed of your sheets and empty your underwear draw into the washing machine. put a massive scoop of scented fabric softener in there and wash. make your bed in full.

8. organise your room. fold all your clothes (and bag what you don’t want), clean your mirror, your laptop, vacuum the floor. light a beautiful candle.

9. have a luxurious shower with your favourite music playing. wash your hair, scrub your body, brush your teeth. lather your whole body in moisturiser, get familiar with the part between your toes, your inner thighs, the back of your neck.

10. push yourself to go for a walk. take your headphones, go to the beach and walk. smile at strangers walking the other way and be surprised how many smile back. bring your dog and observe the dog’s behaviour. realise you can learn from your dog.

11. message old friends with personal jokes. reminisce. suggest a catch up soon, even if you don’t follow through. push yourself to follow through.

13. think long and hard about what interests you. crime? sex? boarding school? long-forgotten romance etiquette? find a book about it and read it. there is a book about literally everything.

14. become the person you would ideally fall in love with. let cars merge into your lane when driving. pay double for parking tickets and leave a second one in the machine. stick your tongue out at babies. compliment people on their cute clothes. challenge yourself to not ridicule anyone for a whole day. then two. then a week. walk with a straight posture. look people in the eye. ask people about their story. talk to acquaintances so they become friends.

15. lie in the sunshine. daydream about the life you would lead if failure wasn’t a thing. open your eyes. take small steps to make it happen for you.

(via elauxe)

A self care list. I’ve been working on this. I promise it’s worth it.

(via sweetbloodsomalia)


I wish I could illegally download clothes